just say the words, and we can run away.

Classes start tomorrow. A whole new term of misery. I don't mean to sound pessimistic, but not a term has gone by that I haven't wanted to pack up everything I own, quit school, and run away. I'm tired of people telling me that I won't be happy anywhere I go. That's not true, because I adapt well to new situations. I always have. I'm old enough to make my own decisions. There will never be a day that I don't regret sitting back while my parents decide where I spend the "best years" of my life. Forty hours on a UCLA application, amazing SAT scores, over 400 hours of community service, countless awards and accomplishments, 4.4 GPA, and the potential to change the world, and I get stuck at the one school in America that is free to apply to, doesn't consider SAT scores, could care less about community service unless you're doing it under their name, and harbors every ounce of potential I have. What happened to me?

When I'm in one city, I like a guy from a different one. I always like the ones that don't like me. Someone should buy me a safe for Christmas so I can put my heart in it and stop trying to give it away.

I don't want to drink. Drinking problems away only causes problems for me. See above paragraph. While everyone is drinking every night, I'll find something else to do. Drinking isn't my way of stress relief. Maybe I'll work out and get cute. I just want my life to turn around.

Happiness should be sold at Target. I'd buy it all the time. I like being happy. Some of my friends make me happy. Conversations late at night in bed snuggled up to someone make me extremely happy. As do conversations on the balcony at 6am, but that's different. 

I was thinking about going to deathfest this weekend, but I'm really nervous. I need a date or something. There's a story behind it, but I don't really understand it.

I want to be a celebrity's personal assistant. 

I just realized that my blogs are ridiculously dumb. I ramble. Oh well. So here's what I'm looking for: someone legit. someone single. someone with potential. someone that thinks the same of me as I do them. Anyone?

Oh, and why do I have the feeling that this time will turn out the same as every other?

Double oh, I want to write things my friends and I want to do on little scraps of paper and put them all in a jar, to be called the "date jar". My friends and I will take turns pulling each time and that scrap of paper will be what we do. I want it to sit on my counter and anyone who sees it will ask about it then get jealous when I tell them what it is.